Surf Rescue

Faisel saved someones life today whilst surfing, which is hard to believe as he can barely swim himself. I completely didn’t notice that someone was drowning, I was too busy watching out for blue bottles and dodging a crazy fish that was ‘coming for me’ (serious) oh and trying to go ahead in our ‘wave off’ which I could not do as I was in full wet suit because of the blue bottles on a beautiful hot day and practically dieing of heat exhaustion. Anyway, Faisel sent an email to all his friends and me about it, here it is reproduced without permission (I like his use of the & to replace the word ‘and’ I see the & as a bitwise operator exclusively) –

I performed a surf rescue today at Manly beach, which I will now tell you about with tongue in cheek!!!!!

Basically me & Gary were having a “Wave off” (surfing stand off where two or more people compete to get massive waves & ride them in a flamboyant fashion). I’ve just finished “hanging 5” (surf trick where one puts one toe on the nose) “out the back” to go ahead in the “Wave off” when I hear some dude shouting out “CHRIS, CHRIS!!!”.

Despite my name not being Chris, my spidey senses started tingling to alert me of a civilian in distress. I look left to see a lone swimmer trapped in a rip & in some strife.

So just as “the Hoff” would do in Baywatch, I start paddling over to him as fast as I can.

Its a 5 minute paddle – I’m there in 1. I tell him not to worry – “I’m a Pharmacist & l know Kung Fu, so you should be safe now – grab hold of the board”.

No, but seriously, he’s got cramp in his leg & couldn’t swim. I waited for a while for him to calm down & get his breath back while holding onto the board (didn’t want him to drag me off the board & drown me – as I’ve heard thats possible with people panicking) Once he was calm I got him on the board & we caught a wave back to shore which was not easy cos we were in a rip & he kept falling off the board!!!

So I’ve got this guy to shore, before he can thank me, I’m riding the rip back out to find Gary & clinch the “wave off” with a freak 15 foot wave on which I “Hang 10” (both toes on the nose).
Eat that Gazza, better luck next time!!!

Obviously this story has been dramatised very slightly.

To reiterate my masculinity I (as well as Gazza’s) have been cited as “double hard bastards” on Mikes (drummer guy who I live with) website.

Go to &click on “links”, then “webspaced” then the insect image, then read the “news” text.

Have to go now – have to save a small child, mother & father from a natural disaster after helping an old lady across the road.